When narcissists get married, the relationship is fine at first because each is happy how the other makes them look. However, when a narcissistic injury occurs, ie when one does not get what he wants from the partner, the relationship begins to go downhill. The perceived failing could be something like changes in physical appearance and clothing that are seen as necessary to help the other partner to belong to a social group.
The difference between the unaware and self-aware narcissist is that the self-aware narcissist may want to change, can acknowledge his stance and may try to change for a while. However, they are unable to sustain any change because their underlying needs remain. As soon as they experience stress, they resort to their original antics.
Although unaware narcissists can try to be present, they are often there only physically. For instance, unlike aware narcs who will understand the need for empathy and will not feel it, they understand. However, the unaware one does not get it and, in a doctor's meeting may stress that he or she came (as am attempt to illustrate their presence), even though they are emotionally very absent. They might entirely misunderstand obvious abuses even, by among third parties that does not even implicate them but requires their empathy for the victim.
It is pointless to think you can do something to encourage them to be more empathetic because change must come from within that person. Do not think you can make a difference by showing more love, sacrifice or doing something pleasing superficially, etc.
CONTENT RELATED TO MARRIAGES BETWEEN NARCS
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