How to control overwhelm

Being overwhelmed occurs when life throws "passive challenges", ie challenges over which you did not actively create. In other words, being overwhelmed is about losing control to resolve challenges. Examples of passive challenges include accidents, health problems, harassment, burglar attacks and so on. Using contrast to better highlight the point, an active challenge is different because, even though it may be difficult, the fact that you actively chose it, creates a psychological cushion. Examples of 'active challenges' include learning a new skill or starting a business. When considering your life holistically, the state of overwhelm occurs when your 'passive challenges' outweigh your 'active' ones.

Why you need to deal with overwhelm

When faced with challenges outside of your control, the ensuing overwhelm is potentially destructive because it can push you into reacting emotionally, rather than responding more rationally. Besides, emotional decisions are often less productive. 

How to overcome feelings of overwhelm

. Let me start with what not to do. Do not try to push even further with the idea that exerting even more effort will overcome your state because that is counterproductive. As mentioned above, being overwhelmed occurs when your 'passive challenges' outweigh 'active challenges'. In other words, there is an imbalance between the types. So if you have 2 'passive challenges', rather than try to push to resolve them, especially when you currently lack the wherewithal, seek balance between 'passive' and 'active challenges'. For instance, absolutely do NOT remove 'active challenges' as a mistaken attempt to devote more effort to the 'passive challenges' that already cause you negative emotions. Do you see how that pushes you further towards imbalance, a polar extreme of lost control over your life?

. Consider feelings of being overwhelmed in terms of levels of control over your life, where overwhelm is on one polar extreme of lost control over your life. The key is to balance your lack of control with 'active challenges' that restore your sense of control. Fill your life with a routine of manageable 'active challenges'. Notice I underlined the word 'manageable'. Example(s)

• organize your environment; 
• physically, that may include making your bed and cleaning your living and work space
• digitally, that may include clearing and organizing your cluttered inbox.  
• Routinely do personal / health care like
• box breathing which is a relaxation technique 
• YouTube video by ;Sunnybrook Hospital 'Box breathing relaxation technique: how to calm feelings of stress or anxiety'
• Mindfulness techniques like focusing your attention to the present by listing things you observe with your 5 senses (of sight, hearing, touch, smell and taste)
• Engage in practices that you can enjoy 

While these 'active challenges' do not directly fix the externally generated 'passive' challenges, research has shown that 'active challenges' are nonetheless useful in restoring a better sense of balance mentally and emotionally. This is a critical side step that keeps you from a deep spiral of overwhelm that makes your mind consumed with your inability to resolve the challenge. As mentioned above, you want to avoid this because this state can even promote destructive behaviors. While this is counterintuitive, rest assured that science backs it up. On that note, I will end with a quote from Seneca the Young; "The mind should not be kept continuously at the same pitch of concentration, but given amusing diversions... Our minds must relax: they will rise better and keener after a rest."

YouTube video by (a US medical health provider) HealthyGamerG 'If you're feeling overwhelmed, watch this'

. After tackling the earlier steps, free your brain of random to-do lists by writing out and categorizing the tasks. Example(s)

• Use the Eisenhower method of task prioritizing management method. Organize your tasks into the appropriate quadrant. For instance, if a task is urgent and important, place it in the top right quadrant for tasks to be done first. Conversely, tasks that are both unimportant and not time sensitive can be discarded.  The ideal is to spend time in the 'schedule' quadrant because that is where you prepare for long-term opportunities. This gives great satisfaction and will also help to prevent items from appearing in the 'do' quadrant. As a side note, look for items that can make other items less problematic. In very desperate situations, for which you do not have the wherewithal to complete tasks that are both important and urgent, I think this technique will not apply precisely. For instance, you may consider trying to find creative, out-the-box ways of tackling a task, even if only partially so that you can resort to completing tasks that you may have placed into other 'lower priority' quadrants. Doing this will help you to apply the advise from earlier steps, ie to tackle 'active challenges'.
  

  
  

CONTENT RELATED TO MANAGING OVERWHELM

• Dealing with isolation and other challenging situations